How to Win a Custody Battle in Your Williamson County Divorce Case
It’s almost always better for parents to resolve child custody cases without going to Court. However, sometimes Court simply cannot be avoided. There are strategies that men and women should follow both inside and outside of the courtroom to strengthen their position when the time comes for the judge to make a decision. Here are some of the most important:
How to Win Custody Outside of Court
No Games – Judges absolutely hate it when it appears that the parties have been playing childish games, especially when it affects their children. Common examples are when a parent purposefully withholds information about a doctor appoint or school function, passively prevents contact with the other parent by not keeping the child’s phone charged or allowing them to return the other parent’s calls, or denies possession altogether. When the other parent is playing games, it’s never a good idea to retaliate; judges are rarely interested in arguments about “who started it.”
No Parental Alienation – Judges can often determine when a parent has been trying to influence the child’s attitude about the other, especially when he or she conducts an in-chambers interview with the child. No matter how great the conflict between the parents may be, it is always frowned upon when one parent tries to turn the child into ally against the other.
No Substance Abuse – It’s not uncommon for parties to accuse each other of too much alcohol consumption to gain an advantage in court. Judges usually do not have a problem with responsible alcohol use, but excessive drinking – if definitely proved – is a problem. Ongoing use of illegal drugs will almost always result in restrictions on access to children.
Be Careful What You Put in Writing – There is simply no place for threats and abusive language, especially in writing. Just about anything you post on Facebook or write in an email is admissible in Court. A good rule of thumb is that if you wouldn’t want the Judge to read it or see it, don’t write it or post it.
How to Win a Custody Battle Inside of Court
Avoid Overly Criticizing the Other Parent – Remember, this is the person you chose to marry and have kids with; exaggerating their faults and drudging up events that occurred long before the divorce was ever filed usually looks worse for the party making the accusations than it does for the one being accused. If a Judge has to pick someone to be the primary conservator of the children, he or she is looking for the most mature and emotionally stable parent. The Judge wants to see which party can rise above the conflict, forgive past offenses, and demonstrate the ability to cooperate with the other parent when the divorce is over.
Focus on the Children – This tip goes hand-in-hand with avoiding too much criticism. The Judge wants to avoid disrupting the children’s lives as much as possible, so he or she will want to know much more about their needs than whatever gripes the parents have against each other.
My friend is getting ready to go through the divorce process. He is really worried about who is going to get custody of the kids. I'm sure that he would feel a bit more relaxed after reading this to get him ready for that. Keeping a focus on the children, like you said, through the process will definitely play a big part in it.
Andre Franklin | http://www.donohoelawfirm.com/Services.html
Our attorneys also recognize that divorce or child custody problems generate a great deal of stress and represent crucial turning points in our clients’ lives.
This is sad that it happens enough that they have to put this down. I would hope that people would try to be as adult as possible and not play games. Keeping the kids in mind before you do anything is what I live by.
Anita Mas | http://www.dunsmuirridler.ca/practice_areas.html
I really appreciate these tips. The custody battle between my ex and I is heating up. It has been the only real point of contention in our divorce. I will make sure to tell my attorney about the games she has been playing. It has been extremely annoying, and it is nice to know that it should help my case.
I agree, it's important to be wary of everything you put in writing when fighting for child custody. I didn't realize that the things you post on the internet could also be used in court. I should keep that in mind as I'm trying to get child custody over my daughter. It would also be smart for me to consult to my lawyer about what I can and can't post on the internet while I'm trying to gain custody over my daughter.
The kinds of situations that divorce lawyers deal with are insane. I couldn't even imagine having to sit down with a couple who is going through the divorce process and helping them figure out who gets what. At least they can trust that their lawyers will help them in the whole process.
I agree that there are certain things that you should and should not do inside the court room. I am focusing on the kids and want to see them just as much as my wife does. Thanks for all the information.
Custody is the main point of contention in my divorce. My wife wants full custody, but I want at least half. I was relieved to read that judges don't appreciate games. My children's mother is quite fond of them, though. Hopefully, the judge will be able to see through her charade.
These are great things to know. I am currently going through a divorce. I do not want to lose any custody of my kid but I also want what will make him happiest. http://blackhillsdivorce.com
It is very important to avoid anything that resembles parental alienation. Maintaining the children's respects for the other parent increases credibility in court. Diminishing the other parent is bad for kids in most circumstances, let alone divorce proceedings. lbensonlawoffice.com
I think it is horrible to try and deny your child access to both parents. If you are going through a divorce and you have kids please do what you can to make the situation less traumatic for them. Take it from a girl who knows what it's like to be that child caught in the middle. It can truly mess with their heads later on.
I hope that my wife doesn't find this article. We are in the middle of a nasty divorce. The main issue of contention is custody of our children. We both want to have full parental rights. She criticizes me all the time in front of our kids. I was excited when I read that judges hate this. I just need to let her do it for a little longer.
I could not agree with this article more! If you are in the middle of a custody battle, your focus should be on the kids. I have seen so many times, the parents criticizing each other, and not even mentioning the kids. This should be avoided at all costs, the kids should be, and are, the most important part. Really, they are the reason you are in this battle.
I can imagine that both parents have a difficult time when going through a custody battle. My parents are still together, and we never had to go through anything like that. I agree that the focus should be on the kids. You need to think about their quality of life and their future. http://www.mcdonaldlawyers.com/family-law/
A friend of mine is trying to win custody of her children. I told her it would be a good idea to find a lawyer, but she isn't convinced. I am going to show her this, and show her how a lawyer could really help her out.
Great information I got here. I've been reading about this topic. I found it here in your blog. I had a great time reading this.
Review Attorney in Los Angeles
interesting thoughts thanks for sharing
Great Post ! Thanks for sharing such a nice information. Divorces not only separate husbands and wives but it also brings a partition between kids. Usually, mothers are always favored in court when it comes to custody of children. But this does not mean that fathers cannot take the custody of their kids. To bring the case in father’s favor, it is important for them to avoid a few mistakes.
You’ve got some good advice for winning child custody. My sister is getting a divorce with her husband, and they have four kids. I’ll make sure that she knows not to play childish games when trying to figure this out. If both parties are honest, I’m sure she’ll get custody.
Thank you for the comments about judges being able to see when a child has been influenced by one parent versus another. My sister has gone through a divorce but has been able to get full custody yet. I bet this article could help her out with being able to go through that case successfully.
Thanks for the tips on winning your child custody case. My brother is trying to work out the right custody arrangement with his ex-wife right now. I’ll be sure that he talks to a lawyer and is careful about what he puts into writing like you suggested.
It makes sense that giving too much criticism will not help you win a custody battle. I am trying to ensure that I get full custody of my son. Maybe I should see an attorney who can help me increase my chances of winning.
Thank you for mentioning how substance abuse can cause you to lose a custody battle. My uncle has recently developed a minor drinking problem ever since his wife divorced him, and he wants to make sure that he can still see his daughter on weekends. I’ll let him know that he should cut alcohol out of his life if he wants to continue seeing his child regularly.
I didn’t realize that judges do not appreciate when parents subtly try to prevent their child from contacting the other parent during a divorce. My wife and I are planning on getting a divorce this year, but she hasn’t been letting me speak to my son in order to hear his opinion on the matter. Maybe I should find a custody attorney that can help me make the right decisions during my case.